


if wind means fire (here comes the flame)

by pissvore420



Series: zuko communicates au [2]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: M/M, MY POWER IS UNMATCHED, Trans Haru, Trans Suki, Trans Zuko, azula also went to therapy, azula post redemption, azulas a painter :), girl help im addicted to pet names, if you say haru is out of character to me ill snap that boy had 3 lines max, jet post redemption, jet went to therapy, this is set a few months after hdyl, trans Katara, trans sokka, yes this is just me projecting onto zuko for another 2.5k, zuko writes kids books and azula and sokka make the pictures
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 17:02:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28781679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pissvore420/pseuds/pissvore420
Summary: "Koj-" he stopped, paused, and continued. "Hey, didn't we date?"Zuko looked up, looking him over."What was your name?"Pause. "Zuko Huo. Nice to see you again, Jet."orZuko runs into someone he once knew. They talk things out.
Relationships: Haru/Jet (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: zuko communicates au [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2110170
Comments: 19
Kudos: 144





	if wind means fire (here comes the flame)

**Author's Note:**

> hi again I decided to make this a series cause im insane and addicted to validation. if you commented or kudosed on hdyl know I wish desperately I could kiss you on the lips
> 
> title is from talkin' johnny and june (your arms around me) by field medic and pickleboy :)

Zuko hadn't actually done anything  _ productive  _ in the Jasmine Dragon since he was 23. 

Now, his main job has been described as "Be boring and near comically unnotable" by Azula, "Provide your aging Uncle with a pleasant presence" by Uncle, and "Stand around and look sexy as hell" by Sokka. He had near no responsibilities here, and that was  _ exactly _ how he liked it.

Occasionally, he'd mix a custom blend or two, for no reason other than his laptop being dead, or hitting a particularly annoying writer's block. It was calming, after so many years. 

When Zuko started working here, though, he was a  _ completely  _ different person. Literally. There wasn't a thing in the world that didn't make him angry back then.

Zuko was 25 and a half when he was trying, again, to write a book. One specifically for kids who… grew up like he did. Alone.

He knew it was what everyone said, but he kept saying  _ if this helps one kid feel seen, if this makes one child feel like they have the words for it, then it's all worth it. _ As long as one little kid could see it and hope for their future, then the abandoned English degree, the tears and the anger and all the years he was so confused and lonely and so, so scared – they meant something. They meant good things, too. They meant that  _ Zuko _ meant good things. That his name was held with connotations of helpful, and honest, and kind, not – well. Not everything it meant  _ then. _

_ Sweetheart, you mean the world to so many people already. No matter how this turns out, it'll be okay, and people will still love you. Your worth is not a book. _

It was a technique his therapist had taught him recently, thinking his negative thoughts and trying to respond how his loved ones would. Sokka was a frequent person in his head, both because of that and because Zuko's stupidly in love with him and thought of him all the time anyway. 

Maybe Zuko was a  _ bit _ codependent.

He'd call Sokka, to talk through his writer's block like he usually does, but Sokka was the only one of the two of them with an  _ actual  _ job, so. He had Uncle, Azula, Jin, and Teo to talk about this with, and that was a no-brainer.

"Azula? Can you come here please?" Zuko called out, making Azula groan dramatically. Zuko was laughing under his breath as Azula acted out dragging herself across the almost empty tea shop, from where she was previously bussing tables. 

She plopped down in the seat across from Zuko, putting her head in her hand in mock exasperation. "Yes, dear Zuzu? Whatever could you need my all encompassing expertise on? Did your shoelaces come untied?"

"Ha ha. How the fuck do I write a book for trans kids?" 

"Don't ask me, I just make the pretty pictures." Azula said, shrugging. "I'd assume you just take everything Father dearest said to us and say the exact opposite." Zuko levelled her with a look over his reading glasses (which Azula loved to make fun of), until she huffed out a laugh, leaning back in her chair. "Oh, come now. Are you saying you  _ wouldn't  _ have come to terms with it earlier if he learned to stop talking to his children?" 

"I mean, you have a  _ point _ . But he said a lot of things about us perverts and arbiters of sin, so." As if to mirror her, Zuko hunched towards his laptop as he spoke. "Not exactly  _ specific. _ "

"Spirits above, what a bastard. Hope he's rotting." Azula got a slightly dark look on her face, before she started smiling again. It’s impressive, how even after 11 years of therapy, her smile was  _ terrifying. _ Now, though, it just filled Zuko with adoration for his baby sister, rather than the fear from when they were kids. "Now, Brother dearest, I'd say just write whatever would've been what you wanted to hear."

"That's the  _ problem, _ though. I can't figure out  _ how  _ to say it. Like, I want to get across that they're not freaks or abnormal or unnatural, but like. How the fuck do I phrase that and sound normal." 

"Zuzu, you've come to the wrong person. You've always been better with words than me."

"Lie, you're great with words."

"Not  _ kind _ words, though. Not words to make people feel seen."

At this, Zuko's heart splintered slightly. 

"Azula, you have to give yourself  _ some _ credit, you've gotten so much better over the years, you're plenty good at kind words." If Zuko were Sokka, this would be where he'd reach over to grab her hand, but he was Zuko, so he just looked at Azula's eyebrows, long since grown out to be thick and bushy. "Would 13 year old you have  _ ever _ complimented me on my word-smithing?"

"No, and she'd've been right,  _ word-smithing _ . Spirits, what are you, a toddler? And they say I'm the one who's living my childhood in my 20s as a result of being horribly traumatized at a young age." Azula sat back up, then, and Zuko must have got a worried look on his face. "Zuko, I promise I will talk to Dr. Liu about this. Does that make you feel better?"

Zuko smiled, said, "Very much so, thank you Azula." And she ruffled his hair, punched his shoulder, and walked back to where she was previously working.

  
  
  


That night, when Zuko was cuddling with Sokka on Sokka's (ratty, uncomfortable) couch, he remembered to ask:

"What did you need to hear, growing up, to make you feel normal? Trans-wise."

Pause. "That my mom would've still loved me, if I was her son."

Zuko reached up from where he was leaned into Sokka's side, and kissed his temple.

"She sees you, and she loves you still."

"Thank you, baby." Sokka was crying, but neither of them mentioned it. Zuko just kissed him on the temple again, before resting back where he was in Sokka's arms.

  
  
  


Talking to Uncle was similarly unhelpful. 

"Dear Nephew, simply take the words that I know have been brewing in your heart since birth, and make your tea the pages."

"Cool, thanks." Zuko deadpanned, before he walked out of the kitchen to the tune of his Uncle's joyous laughter.

  
  
  


Zuko was tapping his fingers on his laptop, staring hatefully at the near empty, white screen.

  
  


**Kyoko was a little girl. No one said she was, but she knew that they were wrong.**

**Sometimes people teased little Kyoko, because they didn't think she was a girl. But she knew she was, so it didn't matter too much to her.**

  
  


Maybe he should call Katara, to ask about how she felt growing up as a trans girl. Probably Suki, too. But he was distracted from that by a very familiar voice calling out.

"Koj-" he stopped, paused, and continued. "Hey, didn't we date?"

Zuko looked up, looking him over. 

"What was your name?"

Pause. "Zuko Huo. Nice to see you again, Jet."

Instead of just going up to the counter and then leaving like a normal person, Jet chose to walk over to where Zuko was sitting, and pull out the chair opposite him.

"Hey. Long time no see." Jet said, smiling. From what Zuko remembered, he didn't smile fully much. "I see the circumstances have… changed, to say the least." Jet laughed along with his words, and Zuko wasn't sure what his own face was doing, but it must've not been what Jet wanted, cause he stopped smiling and laughing pretty quickly.

"Yes, you'll be glad to hear my Father's in prison for, y'know. Murder. And the like." Jet laughed again, much more freely than he used to. 

"Good. If anyone deserves to suffer under the prison industrial complex, it’s that bastard. Here's to that abusive, corporate asshole losing everything he had." Jet held up his hand in a mock toast, because he didn't  _ actually  _ have a drink. Zuko still raised his mug, though.

"You seem happier." Zuko said, putting down the mug and crossing his arms. Jet smiled, but something about it didn't seem right. Like it was sad.

"Yeah. Teenagers, am I right?" Zuko smirked at this, because  _ oh sweet Spirits, did he know. _ "I mean, you too. Imagine meeting our 16 year old selves now. I know I'd knock the shit out of little Jet, no questions asked. Dude  _ needed _ therapy." Jet said, and they both laughed. 

"If I met little me… no clue what I'd do. Probably hand him some testosterone gel and leave." Jet laughed louder.

"About that. Congrats on the gender! You look a lot more comfortable than you did back then." Jet's smile was so wide, but it seemed so genuine.  _ Good for him. Agni knows he never smiled at me like that when we dated. _

"Thanks. I am. More comfortable, that is." Zuko thought back to who he was at 16, and had to repress a shudder. He was working on being kinder to his past self, but. It didn't stop Zuko Now from wishing Zuko Then made so,  _ so _ many different choices. 

"Where'd you get the name from, by the way? It's so  _ you. _ " 

"One of my mom's favourite plays, there's a character named Zuko. He was my favourite growing up, and I always insisted on doing his voice. He was supposed to be the funny one, but the joke was that no one else thought he could tell a joke to save his life." Zuko gestured down at himself, "Which. I'm sure you remember how funny I was." He paused. "And am, to tell the truth." Sokka says he's hilarious, but Zuko isn't sure how much of that is just Sokka being enamored.

"Hey, I thought you were incredibly funny. I just didn't laugh at anything on principle." They both laughed again.

"It's strange, cause to be completely honest, I dreaded seeing you again." Zuko said, and Jet smiled. But it wasn't really like he'd  _ stopped _ .

"Wow, way to make a guy feel special."

"I just mean, cause- the way things ended. Sorry for dumping you, by the way."

"Oh none taken, it finally convinced me to go to a hospital about my whole shit, and that's where I met my current boyfriend, so." Jet said, as casual as could be, and a weight Zuko had no idea he was carrying came off his shoulders. 

"Oh thank Agni, I thought you were gonna try to ask me out again. Which, not to sound mean, but I'd literally rather eat glass than do." Jet laughed, again, and this was going  _ so _ much better than Zuko was scared of.

"Anyway. It was mostly cause I. Am trans. So it's hard for me to talk to people who knew me before I came out." Zuko was wringing his hands again, before he grabbed his mug and took a long sip, just to do something with his hands.

"I mean, Haru's trans too." Jet said.

"Who's Haru?" 

"My boyfriend. But I know enough to not be a dick about it, don't worry."

Zuko was thankful, and they continued to talk and laugh and become familiar with their new selves. Eventually, someone wearing a he/him pronoun pin walked up and tapped Jet on the shoulder.

Jet looked over, and immediately brightened. "Haru! Hey, honey. Sorry I left you waiting, I-" 

"You left your boyfriend outside so you could talk to me? What the fuck is wrong with you?" Zuko said.

"Do you want an itemised list? Haru, this is my ex, Zuko. Haru, Zuko; Zuko, Haru. I'll go get your tea now, darling." Jet got up, kissing Haru on the cheek, before heading to the counter.

"Hi. Nice to meet you." Zuko said, sticking out a hand and feeling  _ particularly  _ awkward. 

Haru shook his hand with a gentle smile. "Likewise." Haru let his hand drop, before he pointed at Zuko's laptop. "What are you working on?"

Zuko felt himself flush a little.  _ Spirits, _ he hated talking to strangers. "O-oh, I write kids books, and I'm trying to write one for trans kids. It's not going great, but. That's the nature of trying important things, I guess."

Haru looked a bit surprised, before he started smiling small again. "You're trans?" Zuko nodded. "Well, I am too, so – would you like any help?"

_ Fuck it. _ It's not like he was making too much progress anyways. "Sure, if you're willing." Haru leaned over to read what Zuko had so far. 

Zuko very suddenly wanted to throw his laptop out a window and hide somewhere very, very far away.

"I like it so far. The prose is simple, but it's a kids book so that's to be expected." Haru leaned up, smiled his kind smile, and looked to where Jet was now walking over with a travel cup. 

"We should be heading out now. It was nice catching up, Zuko. It's nice to know you're happier now." Jet wasn't smiling bright anymore. Now, it was something sad and small, a love letter to who they were, instead of joy and hope for who they  _ are. _

"You too, Jet, Haru. I. I'm happy you're happy." Zuko said, and Jet's smile brightened again. 

"I am. I'm really happy."

"Oh, Zuko?" Haru said.

"Yeah?"

"Give Kyoko a few friends. Show them it's not a death sentence." Haru hooked his arm through Jet's, and they waved and walked out of the shop.

"Thanks." Zuko whispered belatedly.

He reached again for his laptop, and started typing.

  
  
  


"Zuko baby!" Sokka yelled, startling Zuko enough that he dropped his keys.

"Hi, love. Why are you screaming at me?" Zuko closed the door, took off his shoes, and took what he tried  _ very  _ hard to not think of his rightful spot, under Sokka's arm.

"Am I not allowed to be excited about seeing my beloved again?" Sokka pouted, and Zuko smiled, rolled his eyes, and kissed him. "How was your day, baby? Anything interesting happen?"

"My ex came into Uncle's shop, we talked about my transition for half an hour, then his boyfriend came and made me finish the first draft for the trans book. Nothing too exciting." Sokka, though, looked  _ extremely  _ excited. 

"Ex stories! Tell me everything. What's his name? When did you date? Why did you break up? I am so invested in this, you have no idea." Zuko laughed into Sokka's chest.

"His name's Jet, we dated when-"

"Wait. Jet? As in Jet Huang?" Sokka seemed breathless, frozen, and any vestige of joy Zuko had been feeling instantly dissipated.

"Yes? Why?" Suddenly, Sokka started laughing as hard as Zuko had ever seen.

"No  _ fucking  _ way, I  _ have  _ to tell Katara, this is the funniest thing that could have possibly happened."

"What?" Zuko said, over Sokka's continued laughter. "What's the joke? I don't get it!"

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is pissvore420 if you wanna yell with me about trans zuko :) if you comment I will kiss your forehead on god i'll do it try me


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